Even with the best of planning, your wedding day is going to be a whirlwind of emotions, family, friends and events. People will want to spend time with you (as they should), you’ll probably be asked a lot of last minute questions from those with good intentions, and timelines can sometimes feel demanding or rushed in the moment. It’s important to remember, as you go through your day, why you’re getting married.
Unlike busy moments, quiet moments are hard to come by on the day of your wedding. However, they are essential for you because they allow you to take everything in and live in the present. Below, I’ve compiled an easy list of ways to bring your focus back to why you’re getting married, rather than how you’re getting married.
Why this is works: Most likely you won’t have a lot of communication with your partner the morning of your wedding. Writing a letter, as well as reading one, gives you time to step away and collect your thoughts. It’s your time to let things sink in, you’re getting married! To the person you love! It is amazing and wonderful and serendipitous that you two found each other in a world full of people! You absolutely have every right to marvel at this. Reading and writing a letter can also set the tone for when you do see your future spouse.
What to put in your letter: Whatever floats your boat! It can be romantic, or it could be silly. Maybe it’s an inside joke that makes you both laugh every time. Or it could be a poem that reminds you of them. You can even write about a memory that you’re fond of, or brings you back to a moment you both shared. Whatever you decide to put in your letter, let it be a representation of you and your relationship.
“Should I have this moment photographed?” That is completely up to you. Some people prefer to be alone when they read their significant other’s letter. However, I’ve also had clients who had me photograph both of them opening and reading their letters. In the latter situation, my client and I would go to a private area away from everyone and I would photograph them as they read. These moments are precious, so it’s up to you and your spouse to decide which route you prefer to go.
Hold the phone for a second: Let me start by saying this is a bit of a hot topic among couples. Some are all for doing a first look, others want to stay with tradition and see their soon to be spouse for the first time at the ceremony. There is no right or wrong way to seeing your person for the first time on your wedding day. That said, first looks are beautiful quiet moments all on their own, and they don’t take anything away from walking down the aisle to your person.
Why this works: There will be very few moments where you two are alone and away from the hustle and bustle of the day. A first look is a way for you to have your quiet moment, revel in your wedding day with your soon to be spouse and enjoy a moment of peace together. Plus, it gives you many more photos of the two of you as well as a host of other benefits which I’ll talk about in a later post.
Why this works: Your friends and family are there to celebrate you. By doing this, you are recognizing the people who are there to support you. It also gives you a chance to look around you and be present and aware of the major step you’re taking in your life.
How to do this: Speak with the person who is marrying you request they insert this acknowledgement into their script. It doesn’t take a lot of word space or time to have this piece in your ceremony. Here is an example of what an officiant said at a recent ceremony:
“Now, I want you both to take a moment and look at the people behind you. These people are here because they love you, they support you and they are celebrating you and your marriage. Take a good long look and imprint this moment in your memories and in your heart.”
To summarize, my top 3 tips to creating quiet moments on your wedding day are:
If you have any other ideas on to create quiet moments for your wedding day, comment below!